December 11, 2015
The holidays are an exciting time of year, and one prone to overindulgence. With numerous parties and family get-togethers you are most likely overindulging in what you eat, drink and can afford to put on your credit card.
For many of us, as the holiday season approaches, we steamroll into Thanksgiving and in the blink of a blurry haze wake up the following year wondering WTF just happened.
Hopefully, you made it out unscathed, but if not there is a good chance one of these hangovers is to blame.
1. Eggnog Hangover
To get drunk on eggnog takes dedication. You aren’t just dealing with alcohol here but a ton of additional calories in the form of eggs, heavy cream and sugar. And because you can make eggnog with any number of liquors you may be looking at the bottom of a porcelain throne for longer than you want. Keep TUMS close by.
2. Hot Toddy Hangover
Hot Toddy’s are said to be medicinal. The bourbon, honey, hot water and spices can sooth a sore throat and cough as well as help you sleep, but like any medicine, if you abuse it, those benefits can be disadvantageous.
Because bourbon is a dark alcohol it has more impurities (known as congeners), and thus could hit you in the gut or the head. You won’t know which until it happens, but ibuprofen and water are the answer.
3. Mulled Wine Hangover
Red wine hangovers can be hard. Mulled wine hangovers are harder. Like bourbon, red wine is also full of congeners, but add more sugar to the mix and you have a recipe that can end in sorrow.
There is a chance you may wake up with the inability to move. Think sleep paralysis only overly aware of the misery you are in. Text a friend. You may need back up.
4. Hot Spiked Cider Hangover
A spiked cider hangover falls somewhere between the toddy and the mulled wine. Rum tends to be the preferred liquor of choice though bourbon or brandy aren’t far behind.
Warm cider subconsciously reminds us of childhood innocence which is why you drank five of them. Grab a blanket, curl up by the fire and sit tight. It’s going to be a rough day.
5. Champagne Hangover
Remember how bubbly and energetic you were while sipping on that bottle of Cook’s? Little known secret – champagne steals future you’s energy and uses it in the present. Your life force is drained. That numb, empty feeling you have in your brain will only go away with time.
6. Food Hangover
For those who truly know no limit, this is what you wake to after a food coma. Maybe you drank, maybe you didn’t, it doesn’t matter. Your stomach has stretched to its limit, along with your cholesterol and blood glucose levels.
Unlike regular hangovers that typically subside by the following day, this one may stay with you a bit longer. Consider a few days of clean living.
7. Family Hangover
While no substances need to be involved, this could be the worse of them all. Family is family. They know what brings you up, and they know what takes you down better than any outside influence ever will.
At best this hangover goes beyond waking up to find your cousin’s significant other giving knowing glances, and at worse may never go away. Consume in moderation.