Would you like to view the UK edition of this site?

View UK Edition

Food Court - Sn 1/Ep 5Food Court - Sn 1/Ep 5

The Case for Splitting the Bill of Justice

The Case for Splitting the Bill of Justice

Create a free account with Tastemade to save recipes and videos!

Do you split the check or pick up the whole tab? Our plaintiff is tired of his friend always paying the entire bill. What's he to do? Find out on Food Court.

Tastemade App

To save this recipe and more, Download the Tastemade App

Show Facebook Comments

Transcript

- Hello and welcome to Food Court. The litigants are preparing to enter the courtroom in the case of "You want the check? "You can't handle the check." This is the plaintiff, Brian Christian. He alleges that the defendant broke the verbal agreement they'd made when he paid for the dinner at an upscale restaurant. This is the defendant, John Hobbs. He admits to paying the bill for their dinner and claims he was just being a good friend. So let's watch as our litigants divvy up the details of their dispute in Food Court. - All right, Mr. Christian. You're suing your friend, Mr. Hobbs, for $527. Correct? - Ah, no, actually. I'm suing to give him $527. - Um... What? - Yeah, um... I want the court to force him to take $527 from me. - Okay, great. There he is, right there. Give him the money. - He refuses to take it. - Please forgive me, Mr. Christian. Normally a person where you're standing is asking to receive money, not give money. - Right, okay. I understand. Your honor, Mr. Hobbs and I have been friends since college. Every few months, we go out, have a good time, go out to dinner. And he always insists on paying for the check. - That's very generous of him. - Thank you, Your Honor. - You're welcome. - The problem, Your Honor, is that Well, I am in fact a man. Right? And as every man knows, it is his duty to at least be able to pay for the check sometimes. Or said man in fact is no man. - What are you saying? - If I may, Your Honor, I think what Brian is trying to say here is that me always paying is an affront to his manhood. - Ah-ah! He just told on himself, Your Honor! Right there! Right there. See? See? That's exactly it. That's exactly it. He never lets me pay. Every time, he just goes, "Oh, it's fine. "You'll get it next time, bud." But next time never happens, bud. Case in point, last meal that we had At the restaurant, I get up to take a tinkle. And instead of tinkling, I approach the waiter to give him my credit card to pay for the meal, midway through it, right? And I think, there ya go. Fail-safe plan. Not so much, because apparently Mr. Hobbs had already approached the waiter and given him his credit card when he arrived at the restaurant. It's emasculating. All of it. - Mr. Hobbs. Did you in fact tell him that next time, he could get the check? - I did, Your Honor. But it's just a figure of speech. You just say that. I'm in the position where I can bring a friend to a very nice meal, a friend who might need a helping hand, so I do that. Your Honor, Brian has some pretty serious money problems. -I have money problems? I have money problems. This is news to me, Your Honor. That's interesting, 'cause I don't know. Is that why I drove a Hummer here today? Huh? Is that why Is that why I got a Rolex on my wrist? Is that why I own a tiger? Does any of that sound like someone who has money problems? I don't think so. - All of that does. - Wait, did you say that you own a tiger? - Yeah. Yeah, I do. I own a tiger. Bengal. Bengal tiger. One of the most masculine breeds. - I mean, that's... Gotta be really expensive. - Yeah. Oh god, yeah. Yeah, there's a lot of hidden costs, honestly. I don't know if you're in the market or not, but... I don't regret it, but I don't recommend it either. 'Cause he's grown a lot faster and meaner than the brochure suggested and the cost of food alone is staggering. And right now, because he is a carnivorous wild mammal, I do have to live in my garage and he lives in my apartment. - I think this illustrates the point exactly. Brian lives in an apartment, yet he chooses to own a tiger. And now is forced to live in the communal parking garage of said apartment building. Look, he gets his hair done Vidal Sassoon himself, okay? He's dressed like an eighth grade magician. How much did you pay for that tuxedo? - It's not of your business. Listen-- - You're bad with money. I'm just trying to help him out. - I don't need his help. I don't need his help. I don't need his help. I'm a grown man! I am a grown man! - Okay, we get it. - [Brian] Yeah. - You're a man. - [Brian] Okay. - Everyone in the room thinks you're a man. Hey, do me a favor. Tell him if you think he's a man. - You're a man. - Thank you. - What about you, Mr. Hobbs? Do you think he's a man? - Uh... he's a good guy. - He thinks you're a man. - What was that? - It doesn't-- Don't-- You're a man! So many of us agree. That said, two things. One, shut up. Two, I'm ruling in your favor. - [Judge] Look. He's an idiot, but you've entered into a verbal agreement where you said that he could pay the next time and you didn't let him pay the next time so he wins. I'm sorry. That's how it is. Pay the bailiff. She'll give him the money. That's it. Have a good night. Thanks a lot. - Thank you, Your Honor. Thank you so much. Yes! Here you go. - Okay. - Um, actually Would it be possible to split up the payment? - I mean-- Yeah. Sure. - [Brian] Fantastic. Thank you. Okay. 100 on the Capitol One. Let's try 85 on the Chase Debit. What's the policy on a Banana Republic gift card? Is that admissible or not? - I'm gonna say no. - Okay, all right. I have a 20% off coupon on a Bed Bath and Beyond-- - You know what, I got this. I got it. - No. No, no. Sorry, where are we at here? - [Bailiff] 180-- - Give her what you have and get out. - Okay. Just-- - [Judge] Thank you. - I'll take the-- - I think that's just a napkin. - [Bailiff] We'll use it. - I'm sorry. - So how do you feel about your loss? - I'll get over it. Can you make sure he gets this? - Sure. So how do you feel about your victory? - I feel great, man. I feel like I got my point across with time to spare to catch game three-- Oh, my God, my Rolex is a rental. Okay, guys? Anybody see a Rolex? - Well, that'll be all for this episode of Food Court where another bill of justice has been paid in full.

Show Transcript

toggle sidebarComing right up
Autoplay

  • placeholder

    placeholder

  • placeholder

    placeholder

  • placeholder

    placeholder

  • placeholder

    placeholder

  • placeholder

    placeholder

  • placeholder

    placeholder

  • placeholder

    placeholder

  • placeholder

    placeholder